Sunday Funnies 2011.07.31

If all went well this morning, we are on our way to the Wyoming mountains for our annual summer vacation. Our destination is a guest ranch about 20 miles outside of Sheridan. My wife's been going there since she was a wee lass. Her father was an Arizona rancher who got to know the Wyoming ranch family back in the 1940s. In those long-ago days before central air and heat the Wyo family would visit the AZ family in the winter, and the AZ family went to WYO in the summer. After my wife's father sold his ranch the winter visits ended, but the summer ones continued. When my wife and I got married one of the conditions was that the WYO tradition would continue. For the last 20+ years it has.

This place is up in the mountains. We spend most of our time hiking, horseback riding, lounging on the porch, and visiting historic sites.

Deer and antelope abound, along with elk and the occasional moose, mountain lion, and bear.

We go at the same time every year - usually around the first week in August. There are several other families who are repeat visitors at the same time we go. We've become friends with some of them. One of them is a lawyer. 

Last year the lawyer invited a Czechoslovakian friend to accompany him. The friend, happy to get anything free from a lawyer, eagerly agreed. When the time came, they spent a wonderful time, getting up early every morning and enjoying the great outdoors. One morning, as the lawyer and his Czechoslovakian friend were picking raspberries and blueberries for their breakfast, they were approached by two huge bears--a male and a female. The lawyer noticed them in time to run for cover.

His friend, however, was not so lucky. The male bear reached him and swallowed him whole. Seeing this, the lawyer ran back to his Mercedes and raced for the nearest town to get the local sheriff.

The sheriff grabbed his high-powered rifle and raced back to the berry patch with the lawyer. Luckily, the bears were still there.

"He's in THAT one!" cried the lawyer, pointing to the male.

The sheriff looked at the bears, leveled his gun, took careful aim, and shot the female.

"What did you do that for?!" exclaimed the lawyer, "I said he was in the other bear!"

"Exactly," replied the sheriff. "Would YOU believe a lawyer who told you that the Czech was in the male?"