Saturday, September 29, 2012

Can You Hear Me Now?

By now, you've probably seen the video of the worthless parasite obama supporter crowing about her free obamaphone. Thanks to Harper and others, it's gone viral.

What's also going viral (thanks again, Harper) is the cost of the program.
The program is called Lifeline, established in 1984, originally created to subsidize landline phone service for low income Americans, funded by government-collected telecommunication fees, paid by consumers.

In 2008, the program was expanded to support cell phones which quickly escalated the cost of the program. In 2008 the program cost $772 million, but by 2011 it cost $1.6 billion.
Take a look at your phone bill - either landline, cell phone, or both. Somewhere near the bottom is a line item labeled "Universal Service." That fee is collected by your service provider and forked over to Uncle Sam, who takes his cut and then redistributes it to low income households - often more than once.
A 2011 audit found that 269,000 wireless Lifeline subscribers were receiving free phones and monthly service from two or more carriers.
Another example of the government's fabled efficiency.

Since the story gained traction, the obamaphone web site has undergone an amazing -- and curiously timed -- transformation.
Surely this is all just a coincidence. After the video of the Obama crackhead went viral yesterday, we discovered the Obama Phone website, which showed the Empty Chair in all his glory:


Now if you pay a visit the site looks drastically different ... No longer are you treated to the Dear Leader ... much of the site now looks entirely generic, the ubiquitous Obama presence barely visible.
Hmm. You don’t think they’re embarrassed by their own supporters, are they?

If they're not, they should be.

As a special service to readers of this blog, we've compiled a list of features that differentiate the obama phone from regular cell phones (actually, The People's Cube compiled the list - we're just reposting it).

    It automatically rejects calls from people with a different opinion.

    Every time you take a picture, it produces a grimmer image of America.

    It doesn't have a plan; it just keeps telling you how bad the other guy's plan is.

    When it crashes, it blames your previous phone.

    All 3 AM calls go directly to voicemail.

    It has a really useless app called "Biden."

    Pairing it with another device sucks all the energy out of the other unit.

    Type in "job search" and it gives you directions to the welfare office.

    The navigation feature covers all 57 States.

    The default ringtone for international calls is "I'm sorry, so sorry, please accept my apology."

    The healthcare app downloads and installs itself without your permission.

    When you make a call, a teleprompter pops up to help you speak.

    Restaurant reviews are all written by Michelle Obama.

    There are never any winners on Angry Birds.

    Instagram takes two months to process a photo and you have to fill out 3 PDFs to do so.

    Paypal app is replaced with ReceivePal app.

    You can't find "Jerusalem" on Google maps.

    It turns all your Facebook friends into enemies and all your enemies into friends.

    Don't want to work? There's an app for that, too.

    It automatically bows down to phones made by foreign companies.

    When you watch a YouTube video, a US ambassador gets killed.

    When you dial "home", it calls Kenya.

    As opposed to the iPhone, it's called the mePhone.

3 comments:

Pascvaks said...

I've heard it through the grape vine that if Romney wins they're automatically programmed to arm and will explode on impact, wonder why that feature was built in? And who or what would they throw them at? Crazy! What a waste!

Old NFO said...

Sad but true... Vote buying at its scummiest.

CenTexTim said...

Pascvaks - Auto self-destruct sounds good to me. Especially if those parasites happen to be holding them next to their heads at the time.

NFO - Ain't it, tho?